Hard Decisions

I know it will sound like such a cliche' but we really do learn from our mistakes. If we don't, well there is always something we can take away from it.


I am not a person who deals well with failure. Mainly because I always tried to be reasonably good at everything I ever tried. Like sport. I was a huge fan of a lot of sport's when I was younger. Especially baseball, football, soccer, skipping, hoola hooping, sprinting, hurdles...well you get the point.


Then in school. I chose subjects I thought I would be interested in. Modern history, legal studies, economics. I was right. I was good at them. I dropped legal studies later on for fashion classes but I always found legal a little too easy for my liking. Too good, yah know?


But recently I have had to fail at things. Like Broadcast. It is a class all about the news and radio. And I had no choice after bad circumstances of being ill and missing too many classes, too having a bad group and being left on my own to do a huge assignment to just being too stressed with too much work. I will admit, I spent about two hours crying, burnt myself with my hair straightener because I could barely see too. But after some kind words from Dad and my supportive boyfriend, I realized I would take the subject again and totally rule it.


My Dad would say I fail at drinking. But I classify my drinking habits and drunken tendencies as wins. Sorry Dad.


But really, in life, we all win, we all lose. Sometimes. I know it is hard to sometimes say you have failed or lost. And in the end the hardest part is not disappointing someone else, but disappointing yourself. From my experience, you just need to learn to take a deep breathe, wipe away the running mascara, plaster on a smile and keep on truckin'.


Keep truckin'


AccidentlySarah xx

My Phone Photo's

I tend to take what at the time I suppose could be amazing photo's. But when I look back at these amazing works of art, they are not what I wished them to be.
In hopes of not sounding, I think vain would be the word I want but correct me if I am wrong, I have an eye for beautiful things. I like to capture the beautiful thing on camera. Very few times it works. But I am learning...hopefully. And then there are the time I have no idea why I took the photo.


On the right is an event cinema's largest frozen beverage. They are amazing. Seriously, amazing. A bit to much but I still managed to drink one in under ten minutes, before the movie had even started. My friend, who happens to be quite small, including her hands, allowed me to take advantage of her situation of the massive drink.
And now we have photographic memory of her struggle to finish the gigantic frozen goodness.


The image to the right is one of my favourite photo's. There was a black out and being the only one in the house, having not a single clue as to wear the candles might be hiding, I retrieved my lime and coconut scented candle, created a playlist of Elton John, James Blunt and some other soothing music and laid back on the couch to enjoy the darkness.
 In a moment of serenity I noticed how amazing the candle looked in the dark. The light reflected in the glass of the table, in the tiny sound system screen and from the television. One wick was flickering a little more then the other. Which in the photo, was the opposite wick strangely enough.
Anyway, I took a photo. The photo did not turn out nearly the tiniest bit how I wanted it too. And yet it is one which always reminds me to stay calm, breath and just let it all go.
Too anyone else the photo looks exactly what it should though. A blur of crap. But who cares what anyone else thinks about my piece of serenity and happy existence.

Now the image of the ducks is something which always bring a slight smile to my face.
I was out with a friend jogging and there were these three ducks in the middle of the road. They were just waddling along, quacking their gossip and were sure to be murdered by a car.
So off I waddled, quacking my gossip to my following friend and I waddled behind these ducks until they flip flopped their way onto a foot path. It is a reminder that even the little people have feelings. I don't know why.

Although speaking of little things, not all little things. But the spider in the picture on the left was better described as too large to live. I was not the one to stab it with a fork just to be clear. I did not partake in the killing of the poor little thing at all. I just took the photo's of my house mate pretending to eat it's dead twitching body. Spider's have always fascinated me. No clue why, they just do.

Now, the photo to the left is one you have hopefully seen before. My little Grudge incident with my hair extensions.
I could not resist taking this photo. I have many more just like it.
It was a horrific experience which I repeat almost every week or two. All in the name of beauty I suppose.

The final image is one which should have been amazing. The moon last Monday night. It was stunning to say the least. But thanks to the street lights and house lights around, it could not be what it should have been.


I cannot help but think who cares about any of this, but we all like to read a bit of light and fluffy bullshit every now and then right?


Keep talking crap.


AccidentlySarah xxx

  

Woes of Being Womanly (no period talk, promise)

The best feeling in the world is stepping out ready for a night on the pee covered tiles in town, with mountains of curls, pristine make up, a tiny black dress and sky high heels. But what about the time and money it costs to maintain and make these looks happen?

I am one of those girls who spends a fortune on make up. I am a M.A.C addict. But I am also one of those girls who pokes herself in the eye with mascara and liquid eyeliner. Also burning myself with my curler and flat iron. Over clumping my eyelashes. Gluing my fingers together when putting on fake nails. You name it.

The thighs that come with those gorgeous heels you wear on a Saturday night are things you definitely wish would go away for the next few days, but you forget by the next Saturday night when you squeeze you thong tanned foot into those needle thin pretties. Vaseline, lower heels, party gel pads and band aids all help, but still, nothing beats those foot cramps, right girls?

And the dress creeping up the leg. Fashion tape does not work for me. I don't know why, it just doesn't. So I am left tugging my dress down over my miniscule, no muffin top panties a million times a night. 

And speaking of panties, the pain of a push up bra. Not literal pain but they can be so annoying. I already have quite ample natural bosoms to say the least, but my Playboy bra is my best friend.

But ladies, doesn't it all seem worth it when the cutie in the v neck t-shirt chats you up and you leave with a number?

Keep flirting ;)

AccidentlySarah xx

Writer's Ambition and sullen responses.

Growing up I never understood the fascination with magazines and yet at the same time I was one of those hypnotized. I would sit and flip (and tear) the pages of my mum's glossy pages and always wish for something more then tabloid rubbish. It was around the age of ten when I started asking her to buy more Vogue and other fashion directed magazines. But my hunger didn't stop at fashion, I would sift through the dry pages of my Grandparent's Reader's Digest too. It is now I look back and realize, I was born a glossy page, reading, writing addict.


The only difference between then and now, I write for them. Well I hope too anyway if they give me a chance. I remember when I first told a family member I was doing a journalism course, they replied with 'I could imagine you darting after Britney Spears with a camera and getting her loose weave on camera'. I was upset he thought that is what I would be doing. 
In my mind their are the savvy, career hungry ones who fly off to anywhere like Iraq or Pakistan and are filmed or write in the secluded,dirt filled trenches.
And the fashion forward women with their perfect sleek hair, hand bags wedges into the crease of their arm as they strut off in their sky high heels and designer flats to look at Galiano's new season line. 
The one's who sit at home all day with their kids and casually type away their thought's and do the well written research article's we all end up in tears over. 
There are so many more I can imagine, but how would I ever fit into one of them? I still don't know. But I do know, I only write about thing's I love or feel passionate about and I only ever write in my style. Except when a subject dictates otherwise, but I still inject my personal little needle of adrenalin into it. 
Sometimes when I read a magazine I feel like one person has written every single article in the whole front to back glossy. And I realize I sound just like them when I sometimes write, but maybe that will bring me closer to being accepted. But maybe it won't. 
I always try and read every single article in every magazine I pick up. No matter how badly written or boring it is. It is a habit I like to get into. I accept all writing. 
And yet I want to be an Editor some day. I won't be able to read every single submission or answer every email. But at the same time, what about those poor girls (and boys) who pour their hearts into the letters and email sent to Editor's they admire. And the excitement that runs through every inch of them when they see a reply, but it is from the secretary or personal assistant of that idol.
I did just that to Australian Vogue Editor in Chief Kristie Clements. I always end up calling her Kirstie and have to Google to check. I am not sure why. Well, I wrote to her, saying how I want to be just like her. Well now I don't. I got her personal assistants reply. I felt the fire go out in heart but then I studied up on Anna Wintour. She is by far my favourite editor. Although known as a bit of a stiff and a serious person, she is professional but has a private life.
But whether it is the life for me..who knows and I guess we will see.


Keep writing.


AccidentlySarah xxx

Alcoholic Tendencies

When something or someone is pretty, you admire it, you take photo's, you think about what it would be like to be just like that. In my mind, alcohol can be beautiful and it makes things seem more appealing too.

Christmas Day has slowly become less exciting to me. Even the opening of presents has become an almost routine drawled out process. And the Christmas just gone, being my first Christmas being 18, everyone decided to get me alcohol related presents. Which I didn't necessarily mind.
Now, I was slightly sick on Christmas. When I say slightly I mean highly dizzy, a little vomiting, fevers, chills, migraines...
I didn't feel like eating too much but someone had a brilliant idea to numb some of the horrible feelings with a few Cosmo's, margarita's, tequila slammers, etc. And it did work. I put to good use my oversized glass I received which I have pictured above. The photo you may say, you can barely see what it is and I do have a clearer photo, but this one was a prettier.

Now the photo on the right is pre-drinks for New Years. We had other drinks also but these bottles just stood out as being oh so beautiful. I think that is why we chose them in the first place. New Years 2010-11 was quite enjoyable. Although I did not get my midnight kiss like I begged for (kind of) I did get a 1:25 am kiss. It was magical I must say. Myself and five girls and one of their boyfriends all left on the bus to Surfers Paradise high on life and our first year of being 18 for this event. By the time we got their, it was just myself and a friend left to go into the biggest party venue as the other's didn't want to pay the hefty cover charge (which was worth it). As midnight got closer, we drank our souls away and by the time the champagne exploded and confetti was everywhere, we were jumping, hugging and screaming our alcoholic brains off. The evening ended with a stumbling through Surfers around 4am. Everything looked amazing in this light. Even the alley ways which were dark, full of bad smells and creepy people seemed adventurous to us at the time.

The next image, I am pretty sure went along with New Years. But I can not be 100% sure. But every single one of these drinks, although girly were absolutely amazing. Raw Berry Smirnoff, which I haven't found since that night, Carnivale Vodka Cruisers, which taste just like apple and Watermelon Bacardi Breezers which tastes like lipsmackers.
They are always great choices to make the ugly look more attractive though.


I really do not condone underage drinking. I did, I wish I didn't. But I don't advise completely blocking underage people from alcohol as they need to build their sea legs so to say. Many of my friends who took their first drinks on the 18th or after, could barely walk after a few cruisers while the rest of us were able to push through constant drinking till 3 am. Although we would stumble home, we wouldn't need to be carried by 11pm.
I am still just only 18 and I go out most weekends, although we do give it a break every now and then to let our bodies catch up. I remember one weekend where it took us almost a whole week to regroup then as we felt better we had those pony neck bottles to our lips again.


But anyway, I will end it with the thought of me staggering home again through Surfers this weekend and a god unknown hour.


Stay sober.


AccidentlySarah xx

Benefits of Being Sick

I cannot help but kind of enjoy being sick. The comfy pillows, being snuggled up with blankets all day (well in the air-conditioning), the chicken soup and just having time to relax. 
When I say relax, I mean relax. Some days I barely sit down. In between working, uni, friends, my boyfriend and everything else I have going on , it's hectic. It is no surprising I do get sick at least once every month for one or two days. 
But, it is amazing for almost everyone when you think about it. My favourite thing is the way I look the following week. 
When I was a kid my Mum would drill me with vitamins and water and green tea. Lot's of fruit was also on the menu. I still do all this. So a few days of this is amazingly good for your skin. I usually keep it up for a week after I am sick also just to make sure I am fully better. Now, I do do this all the time anyway, but I mean just water and green tea and LOTS of vitamins. 
It also gives your hair and skin time to breath. Being by yourself in bed means no make up, no hair products. But if I am sick for a few days I will stick on a face pack and a hair treatment. So even better.
The week after I am better, my hair and skin tends to still be sickly. Healthy yes, but I feel sickly. So it usually calls for a hair cut, treatment and facial. 
Also, plenty of texts and phone calls from Mr.Boyfriend to make sure I have not sneezed myself to death.
I think this was kind of a pointless ramble since I do have a cold/flu thing at the moment, but I enjoyed writing it...


Keep healthy.


AccidentlySarah xx

Female Mirror

Long, black hair, curled, teased and sprayed into a flowing cascade of hair, flowed down the large, pouted breasts of the cat of seduction. Black tights stuck like a second skin, partnered with a simple white tank top which was a canvas for a rusted, black rosary bead, cross necklace. Deeper then blood red nails rounded perfectly, swept back hair falling in front of smokey shadowed and lushly lashed eyes. The skin which sprung youthfully over high cheekbones held very little imperfections and it was almost like the girl knew she looked eye grabbing as she strutted down the cobble walkway in faux-fur topped boots with a block heel.
As she entered through the pristine sliding glass doors, laughing confidently at a male friends joke, she turned her direction towards the closing elevator doors. The elevator looked like it was tight enough with five people already nervously positioned inside, but the young, dark haired boy with slightly too chubby cheeks inserted his hand between the closing panels of steel. But his hand was waved back inside by her male companion as they waited for the next elevator.
They confidently stepped inside their rising steel-box chariot and she quickly scrunched her hair at the roots, flicked back her fringe and put her 60's inspired sunglasses back inside their sheer case. She glanced back at the mirror to notice the third male in the elevator glancing down at her chest and then quickly doing a once over her but averting immediately back at her chest. With a smile she thought her mornings hard work was proven well if she could at least make one person happy, even if it wasn't exactly pure thoughts.
The morning routine consisted of a quick shower, which would further detail the removal of unnecessary hairs, the severe exfoliating of skin from head to toe, the softening of cuticles, the full removal of any traces of make up, in between hair wash hair protein spray and unscented body lotion to soften the skin.
This was followed by a quick once over spray of medium tanning mist, silky smooth deodorant, cuticles being pushed back, nails being given a once over smoothen and face being primed.
Make-up consisted of a routine she had beaten down to five minutes, including fluid foundation, concealer, setting powder, eye shadow smoked around the eye, light eyeliner, curling lashes, mascara, more lash curling, a little more mascara, blush, eyebrow shaping and filling in and lipgloss.
She follows her makeup by spraying heat protectant throughout her hair and over her hair extensions laying on her lap. As she heats her curling wand and hair straightener she combs through her extensions then clips them into the places they are trained to go every single day. The next fifteen minutes is devoted to curling with the wand and soft tousling with the straightener. A last mist of hair spray announces the trial of the wardrobe.
Although the weather was already creating a little sweat on the back of her neck she decided to still continue with her outfit. She took her daily photo of her outfit to send to her boyfriend at work so he felt involved and she walked out the door.
Well that is what she wanted people to believe how she got ready in the morning.
Her shower every morning leaves her skin tight, red and aching. Often leaving her skin sometimes dry. All the sprays and scrubs for her skin are to control the various issues she has with them. Well as best to their power she hoped. She was often left with tiny streams of blood down her legs from shaving to fast and they stung under water.
The spray tan would often turn her skin a strange colour if she applied it wrong, resulting in the need to wear long cover up clothing.
The make up process was one she spent hours developing so she knew she looked good but could do very quickly. She still was often left with greasy skin, flakey foundation, miss-shaped eyebrows, smudged eyeliner and globs of mascara in her eye. Which would mean more time correcting her mistakes.
Her hair was inspired by Kim Kardashian and Nicole Scherzinger with a little twist of her own. But she hated doing her own hair. She would rather spend time doing her friends hair.
The secret to her pouty breasts was an already voluptuous E cup but also her secret Playboy bra's to boost them too their full potential. She struggled with putting her tights on as her false nailed would snag on the material. And her boots gave her sore baby toes.
And if you look closely enough, her nails have traces of green nail polish surfacing from the corners from the last coat to develop the deep red. The paint was chipping and there were scratches in them from being stuck in objects.
Everything about her from the outside may have spoken elegantly about confidence and sex appeal, but really, only few saw her imperfections and loved them as much as she hated them. But when she walked through public she was an object which seemed to aim for perfection. Secretly, she didn't care what they thought, but only hoped to brighten at least one persons day with a smile.
I often wonder why do all of that every morning for such a meager result, but it is the truth of what females do. Some do it for attention, other's do it to make themselves feel better. Myself, I do it for a smile. And yes, that was me, today.

Keep strutting.
The cat of seduction,
AccidentlySarah xx

Hair Extensions- Horrific Washing Experience.

I decided to buy black clip-in hair extensions from Starkles a short time ago. So far, I am liking them a lot. It makes a huge difference to my style and they are fairly easy to maintain.

They had gotten a little itchy and felt a little like horse hair, so I knew it was time to give them a wash. And I did not get warned on what I would see. I left the bathroom and came back to think the Grudge was emerging all over the place.

How I got taught to wash my extensions was to run luke warm water and add shampoo as natural as possible and swish it around a little to make the water bubbly. Next you run the extensions through the water and rub the hair a little under the water and leave it submerged for a few minutes.

Nobody ever told me the hair would turn grey. Apparently the dye from dark extensions can run a little. A LITTLE! I thought I was staining the sink.

Next is to empty the water and rinse the extensions clean and then do the same again with conditioner. Then rinse them again and add a treatment. I could tell it was working even under the water as they were already silky soft again.

After, it is a blast of cold water to coat them and then gently pull on the hair to strain the water. I felt quite strange, although I later explained it as washing a very hairy dog.

I combed through the hair a few times after shampooing and whilst the conditioner and treatments were in. I also washed the wefts separately to stop them from tangling.





 I left them to dry one by one over the edge of the bathtub whilst I cleaned down the sink.

Looking back at these photos the hair looks horrible. Tangled and matted. And it was. Whilst wet, it was a mess!

I laid down a towel on my bed. Combed them out and sprayed with heat protectant. I waited 5 minutes then blasted with a hair dryer but left them slightly damp.

On the left is them still wet before I combed them through. You can see why you have too keep combing them. They tangle so easily whilst wet.

But once they were fully dry I sprayed with heat protectant again and then straightened them out.

They really were like new again. Perfect.

I am going to do another blog with more detailed pictures on how to wash them and some maintenance tips.

Keep smiling.

AccidentlySarah xx

Basic Make-Up

On the phone to Mum the other day, she told me how she would often catch me playing with her make up. She said I was always trying to imitate how she would do it and try and look like celebrities. I was only around the age of five. 

I stopped using make up but still would spend at least a few night s a month experimenting with it. It wasn't until the middle of grade nine when I started using a little lipgloss and some cheap mascara. I then asked Mum for some pan, which apparently was a thick concealer. It looked horrible.

By the end of grade twelve I was starting to buy MAC products and experiment with some drug store brands like Revlon and such. 

I still try and imitate what I see. It is the best way to learn, by learning by your mistakes

Yesterday I went on a shopping trip and took a venture into the Giant Chemist to buy some discounted Revlon and Rimmel London foundations. I didn't want to buy them full price incase I didn't like them.

The Revlon Photoready Make up in Natural Beige is a little to dark for me, but mixed with Rimmel London's Stay Matte, in Ivory, makes a very close colour to my skin. It is only the first day using these, but I found the Revlon PhotoReady a little greasy on the skin. But I found the Rimmel London Stay Matte with my MAC Studio Fix powder in NC35 over the top is the best so far.

The Revlon PhotoReady from the Big Chemist was $19.95, and the Rimmel London Stay Matte was $9.95 and came with a Fix & Perfect foundation primer in 001. 

I am a MAC lover. It isn't for everyone but I love it. My ordinary foundations and concealer are again, the MAC Studio Fix foundation powder in NC35, the MAC Studio Fix foundation fluid in NW20 and the MAC Select Cover up concealer in NW25. I am not sure how I ended up with all the different shades, but it is what works best for me. 

When I first apply my powder I look a little dark but within ten minutes it looks like the right colour. 

Now I haven't found a mascara I love more then the MAC False Lash. It is amazing. It really does make you look like you are wearing false lashes. I haven't tried applying it over fake lashes yet, but I cannot wait. There are some days when the only makeup I wear is a light brush of the Studio Fix powder and my False Lash. It looks amazing with a smokey eye. 

To clarify, I am not a professional make-up artist and definitely have not been endorsed to say I love these products. I have paid with them out of my personal money. 

Will post another make-up blog soon.

Stay groovin'.

Sarah xx

Beauty Experiment

Okay, I know I have failed so far with keeping up the blogs every day. And I know it is weak to make excuses, but I genuinely have been too busy. Somehow, I am going to work it into my nightly routine.

So, for a creative writing class we have the option to write a piece which is a result of something we have done which is outside our comfort zone. I was originally going to give up makeup and hair products for a week. Then I took it into perspective, it would mean no make up at work, uni or going out at night. But, I did a better idea.

Last Saturday night when I went out with one of the girl's for the night, I had a bit of an uncomfortable experience. I recently have dyed my hair just off black and started wearing extensions. For the spirit of the look, I created doll like makeup with blood red lips and very smokey rock star eyes. Choosing something comfortable to wear, I slid into a fitted black singlet dress and slipped a sheer bum length top over it, which opens at the bust with a zip. I did look good, I won't deny. But it was what resulted from this that makes me want to never wear make up again.

Arriving upon our first destination, I immediately noticed female glares. I am pretty accustomed to them as I have a naturally large bust but this was on a new level. We took a seat in a booth while it was still quiet and had a drink. To which followed some snide comments from the girls in the next booth. Further on the night went and I was further more shunned and rudely communicated with by the what seemed to be giant anti-me clique. There was one upside though.

The male attention. I had majority of their attention. When the female bartenders ignored me, I was instantly served by a male one. On the dance floor it was a constant battle of avoided the drooling messes. And walking from club to club was like walking through a jungle of blood thirsty baboons. It may seem like I am over exaggerating and talking myself up, but I really am not.

I left feeling emotionally drained and spent the next day crying on my boyfriend's shoulders. Even writing that I feel like a failure, but it is true. I felt like I didn't have a friend in the world and I was only here to be put on a pedestal. But it did give me an idea for my article.

In comparison to the evening from hell, I would have a day of not wearing make up and sexually appealing clothing. Well, a casual outfit at the least. I tested an outfit on my boyfriend to see if it would be less appealing to the male population. Black Harem pants, a sheer black lace shirt I twisted to show a little belly and a tailored black jacket over the top. I accessorized with a tan belt around the waist of the pants and a pair of heels. I knew it would still look appealing but I still felt like an idiot who has travelled from the 80's. And it turned out to be very appealing. So, that was a fail. I didn't even wear my extensions. And he honestly said I looked amazing. So back to the drawing boards for the outfit.

I have decided to stick with a pair of plain black shorts, a simple top and maybe a jacket, no heels. Simple makeup, only mascara, lipgloss and a little concealer under my eyes. No extensions. It will be very different for me as I like to stand out with my precision makeup and hair and quirky outfits.

The experiment is going to test human reactions to artificial beauty and see if the roles will be reversed.

I will fill you in as I go.

Stay beautiful.
Sarah xo